We live and breath in a world that is beautiful and lovely…and hard.

The rocks and the trees, the sun, moon, and stars cry out in praise to God, but at times, even His creation groans (Romans 8:22).

Many people we encounter on a daily basis weep and are hurting and longing to “get beyond” the moment and find rest.

The restlessness in these days is palpable; fear is etched on many faces.

Even conversations with those who are redeemed children of God remind us that, Jesus said, “in this world, you will have troubles,” but followed with the hope to “take heart; (He) has overcome the world.” 

As they struggle with their own difficult situations, I hear the very real tension and I have experienced the same at times: they trust God for their lives but wrestle with the circumstances and emotions that come with living in this fallen world – fear, anger, hurt, illness, sadness, loss.

Choosing to subdue and take captive those emotions while laying them bare before the God of all comforts at the throne of grace begins to settle the soul. Asking Him to remind of His presence and letting Him bring a supernatural peace is an intentional choice we each must make in those incredibly stifling moments or seasons.

Every one of us have been there.  Our commitment to and love for Christ compels us to believe His best for us, but our emotions, often so raw, cry out with questions.

There are times we feel like saying, as the father of the young boy in Mark 9, “I believe; Lord, help my unbelief.”  But sometimes the enemy of our souls wants to make us think we cannot share that with God; that we cannot let Him hear our heart’s cry.  How far from the truth that is!

Our reactions are not a surprise to God. He knows our needs, our frailties, and our fears.  And He longs for us to nestle in the arms of our Abba Father, our Daddy God, and be refreshed and renewed.  Because of the work of Jesus Christ on the cross, we can boldly go to Him with our pain, not in defiance, but in humility and in assurance.

Hebrews 4:16 reminds us, “Therefore, let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”

When we read the Psalms, we often find that David fearlessly poured out his soul to God, and God calls him a man after His own heart.  He laid bare his fears, his sin, and his anger at circumstances and injustices, crying out to the Father to be heard and longing to hear, see, and experience His presence. David acknowledged his questions and what disturbed him; but, in the end, David gave God praise and trusted in His control.

He knew, as in Psalm 5:3, that he could approach the throne of grace with assurance that God would hear and respond, “In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation.”

In Dr. Ralph Davis’ book, “The Way of the Righteous in the Muck of Life, Psalms 1-12” (a book which spoke volumes to me and which I highly recommend), he refers often to this pattern of David’s life: to acknowledge the cries of his heart and then give God praise, resting in the truth of who God is!

In Psalm 3, David cried out “Yahweh, how many are my foes!  How many are rising up against me!”  But as Dr. Davis points out,

      “In the middle of his mess, [David] is saying [in verse 3], ‘I know my God.’  In face of the threats and ruckus and theological opinions of his enemies, David turns his eyes to his protecting, sufficient, restoring, accessible God.  The God-centeredness of his gaze keeps him steady while his enemies try to decide what precise level of scum he is.”  Psalm 3:3 – “But You, Yahweh, are a shield around me, my glory and the One who lifts my head.”

 Again, in Psalm 6, David pours out the “agony he knows.”  In essence, David often says in the Psalms, either directly or indirectly, “How long, O Lord?”  Dr. Davis writes,

     “…the problem of time contributes to his agony.  This is one of our perennial problems with God’s ways.  We have our calendar. We have figured out how long we can hold out.  And somehow Yahweh allows our urgent deadlines to pass.  Why?  David’s ‘How long?’ means: How long will you allow this to go on?  Why don’t you intervene and give me relief?  Why does He wait?  Why does He hold off?  When we say God will intervene sooner or later, why does it always seem to be later?  Our troubles, it seems, are as much with God as with our circumstances.”

But then Dr. Davis reminds us that David settles his heart on the character of God.  David “is resting on Yahweh’s character, in the sort of God he has declared himself to be…[the God of covenant love, ‘hesed, the devoted love that pledges never to let go of us’].  Sometimes this is your only stay in trouble…”

And though nothing has changed in that one moment, he presses in on truth that sustains his hope, “For Yahweh has heard the sound of my weeping!  Yahweh has heard my plea for grace!  Yahweh will accept my prayer!” (vv 8-9)

As we acknowledge God’s sovereignty in our lives and grow in our love and knowledge of Him through His written word, the Bible, we also mature in our understanding of His heart and the freedom we have to lay bare all that we are before Him – even our cries.

God points us to the Psalms to remind us that it is what He allows, even desires, of His children.  He knows our hearts even better than we do ourselves, but He delights when we ask and expect Him to respond, to draw near to us.

He is the God of all comforts and He delights in His children drawing near to Him so that as He, in turn, draws near, we are held close and know His presence regardless of our circumstances and our questions.

“Lead me to the Rock that is higher than I…” (Psalm 61:3)

You are the Rock on which I stand.

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. ” Psalm 73:26

Sometimes glimpses into the past give us a renewed vision for the present; sometimes they are reminders of what we know is true.

As I have been culling through a multitude of papers and journals in an attempt at reorganizing, I have read quotes from the mouths of my little ones, now grown; I have laughed and cried at the memories. 

Reading old journal entries of my own, I am reminded of the joy and the struggle that came from being a new mom and from later years when it was a new phase in the role which I had grown to love and cherish and for which, it grew increasingly clear, God’s grace was much needed.

In the midst of the reorganizing, I found this piece, “Caretaker for the King,” which I wrote when we had just two…a third would come along a year and a half later.  I decided to share on my blog as it is my heart’s desire to encourage parents in the trenches now and remind those of us with children now grown (and still growing), that these things remain true. Our roles may be different, but our purpose as parents is the same.

“I am no one extraordinary per se.  Whatever my children become, whoever they be – they are the Lord’s and I am a caretaker for the King.

That’s not to say that being a caretaker is not challenging or unimportant.  On the contrary, it is probably one of the most monumental, overwhelming yet fulfilling challenges I could ever face. 

But in the moments when I hold on too tightly or allow my children to become “idols,” I must stop, step back, and refocus.   A caretaker needs care as well.  For when my heart and eyes are on the “chaos” that sometimes surrounds life with little ones, I grow so weary! Yet, when they are on my King, I am a more effective caretaker in all ways. 

God has equipped them, provided each one with talents, gifts, and unique personalities.  Our job is to nurture a love for Him and for His Word, to teach them a right fear of the Lord, and to help them develop that which He alone has instilled and is still unfolding in their lives for His glory!

We seek to direct and guide based on the infallible guidance we have received in God’s Word but which will always come through fallible hands – our own.  We are to model the character of our King for our children so they will believe what they hear because of what they see. 

Mistaken at times. 

Failing too often. 

Yes. 

Living between the now and the not yet, the frustration of my failures is, at times, overwhelming.  But God’s grace covers it all in Jesus!  And through our foibles we are able to point the way to a forgiving Savior – the only perfection – and His power to grow us and make us more like Him.

Our two children – and soon to be three – have been given to us but for a time which oh so rapidly speeds by.  I want to redeem the moments, each small in and of themselves, but the multitude of which make up life and are immense. 

Tyrannized by what “must be done” or by what the world says I deserve to do for myself, I often miss a teachable moment – for them or for myself  (for sometimes, they are my “teachers”). To use these moments for God’s glory and their good or against God’s will and to their detriment — that decision is important and is made daily.  The task is rich and made possible only in Christ’s strength.

How will God use them – their talents, abilities, gifts, personalities, understanding?  Will they live their lives and use those abilities for His honor, for the fame of King Jesus?

However He may choose, may we be caretakers who encourage them to seek that goal, to press towards it, long for it, strive after it, and achieve all for the glory of the King and for the souls of men! 

May we teach them well, taking great pleasure and joy in being caretakers of these little lives for the Him who is our Redeemer!

And, when that time comes in their own lives and little ones arrive at their feet, their own “mission field,” may they be equipped and humble before the Lord, to also be caretakers for the King, for the next generation‘s children of the covenant.”